That Inevitable Line

Had a horrendous 8am class today. Physic's lecturer totally had an outburst at us. Kinda made the rest of the day a little solemn. I got rather upset about what he said. Felt a hard pinch. Maybe cause I thought we were friends. After all the hours spent in musical. All his expectations I tried to fulfill, and I would daresay I achieved half of what was intended. After all the personal matters between the boyfriend and I was shared with him... And he even stretched an arm of friendship to us. And all of a sudden just because part of the class was unsettled and was a tad bit noisy with slight chatters, he got seriously ticked off and accused ALL of us for taking advantage of him. I totally get why he was so pissed off... We were kinda out of line. But not ALL of us. But like the previous issue. ALL of us got hit. When he said "I have no friends in this intake and don't greet me, or talk to me, or even smile when you pass by. Just finish your damn work." Not the exact quote, but something like that. It was an ouch for me somehow. No one else thought about it that way. Boyfriend is barely affected because he thinks that's how he handle things and doesn't really mean what he says. But well I think harsh things like that shouldn't be mentioned if you don't mean it. I mean, it's better not to let the tongue slip than to apologise about it when the damage is done...

Anyhow, I don't know why I feel affected and upset about this. He always said he never allows his 'lecturer' status to prevent students from having a friendship bond with him. Seems like that's inevitable. There will always be that barrier. And I guess that's why I feel this is somewhat like an issue to me. Ah well, lately I've been a little easily affected by the way people react to certain things. I realised that some wounds do linger and it doesn't really go away. Some wounds were further severed and I doubt it'll ever be healed. Everyday I'm challenged to view people differently. Friends come and go. Closer friends find it easier to step outta the door. And the only way I can ever protect myself, is to let go.

Quoting Mun Wai : "Ya know, when an argument happens with a CLOSE (or was it best? xD) friend, it hurts like SHYTE!"

You said it! So I guess I'm gonna try to avoid whatever it is. Kinda tired of his hot and cold treatment all the time. Now I'm thinking whether to stay on with Musical. After what happened today, I feel rather odd to even look at him. He took things too personally, and made it personal for others. Well, as far as I know, only I took whatever he said personally. Maybe that's what you get for caring too much.

It hurts to CARE.
Ignorance is truly BLISS!

Just wanna look beyond the horizon of a different view.
Wonder how it feels like to drown in that ocean...