Choked Up Windpipe

I've been avoiding the net all day.

Even if I do come on, I do a quickie,

then scramble to go on a Gossip Girl marathon...

Which is getting a little boring...

After watching 6 seasons of Sex and the City and both the movies,

any other scandalous shows seem juvenile!

Anyway, I'm pretty freaked out about tomorrow...

No idea how's the day gonna be,

cause there wasn't much information provided.

Orientation :/

I feel like a hypocrite...

I've been advising those who were going through this,

yet when I'm in the situation, I'm freezing...

Talk about "practice what you preach" :s

Above all, I feel like my emotions are bottled up in my throat...

It's been pretty difficult to breathe since I left his house this afternoon.

Drove home from his place, feeling lost and alone.

Was about to burst into tears, but I was too caught up trying to find my way home...

THANK GOD!

And now I'm constantly feeling the urge...

But I'm terrified.

Because, if the waterworks start...

It may never stop. Or at least, not till my tear ducts malfunction.

We didn't get a proper goodbye.

At least not the one I expected.

So I guess it was sadness and disappointment, piled up.

And the fact that I was so flustered about the directions home,

made it difficult as well...

But as I got home, I realised...

I unconsciously avoided a proper goodbye.

He's probably still in transit...

Haven't heard from him yet.

This feels like the whole Korea episode again xD

I was actually waiting for my phone to ring...

To hear Jay Z start rapping at the start of "Empire State of Mind".

We both have the same ring tone :)

Then I realised, he's not gonna call tonight.

I'm not gonna be able to share about how freaked out I am...

Ah... I can't bring myself to finish this post...

Not with the stupid tears trickling down my cheeks.

God, I'm starting to sound needy! BLEH!

I better not wake up with puffy eyes tomorrow...! :s

Which is why I'm just gonna end this here...

I miss you... already...